Eulogy by Dael and Luke - TO OUR COL
By DAEL AND LUKE - December 6, 2004
To our darling Pookie – from Dael and Luke.
Col – you were the compass of my life and without you I feel directionless. But I hear you say “turn it up” and so I will and find a way to live as whole-heartedly as you always did.
The first time I met you that I was bowled over by the suddenness of your smile and the wit and intelligence it implied.
That humour was a theme of our lives, there were always lots of laughs. I forgive you for making me the fall girl when Luke and you got together and I was cast in the role of clueless, technophobic innocent at loose in a world far too complex.
People have talked about your kindness, and you were utterly so. You didn’t suffer fools gladly but probably lent far too many willing hands. I thank you for encouraging me to return to university and for your patience in reading through the intros to my essays, not once or twice but up to 10 times as I added an extra word or took out a phrase. And with this, like everything you did, you would give the essays your full attention, totally focused on ferreting out any suspect pieces of logic, and vigilant in the face of my less than perfect grammar.
So it was with everything. When you took up running, it was marathons, when you became a trout fisherman you began tying the most beautiful, intricate flies. When you started to appreciate fine wine, your knowledge became encyclopediac within months and then because you realised the standard of food needed to match you turned yourself into a wonderful cook, creative and inventive, - yet another string to your bow yes, but also something else that kept you up and busy, and ultimately exhausted.
And even if you’d had your usual long day, you’d drag yourself out of bed at 2am to watch your beloved Spurs get beaten again then be on the email to Rick with your suggestions as to what player the team should buy to improve its future chances. You loved a flutter, and that was all to do with bloodlines. As with everything, for you a bet was not a gamble, particularly, it was an investment in the time you had spent checking pedigrees and past form.
Another part of your mosaic was that you loved music, art, literature – and yes, I was impressed when you took the Odyssey on holiday and read the whole book. You adored our cats and the way Yody would reach up for a sniff kiss or a session licking the hairs on your leg
Through our more than 30 years together I never lost a sense of anticipation when I heard your footsteps on the stairs. Once in the door, if you’d had a bad day, in your typical way, it would be described as the worst day of your life. Half-hearted, that was never you.
There was also the person who once he had looked into the tenets of Buddhism, went to Japan, became a Buddhist and had a deep and abiding belief in the karmic law of cause and effect. The monk that came to bless you as you lay dying said “he will be alright”. And I believe it. You earned yourself a rest, you completed your mission here fabulously, but Col, please do stay close, so that we can still feel your wise and guiding hand. My darling man, I will always love you.
Pop, you were my best mate first and my dad second. I am glad that I could tell you everything that was happening in my life and that you would support me. I am so happy that we had that kind of relationship.
How I will most remember you is as a man with a great sense of humour who could always make me laugh. Coupled with that you had a fantastic smile. You were also the hardest worker I have ever met and threw yourself into everything with absolutely all your heart. You were also a terrific husband and I could not have hoped for a better dad.
While I am very upset that you had to leave far too early, I really do feel as though you are watching over me and mum and that helps ease our pain. I’m glad I was with you for those last hours and am very proud of how you fought to hold on.
Dad, you always used to kid me about how you weren’t getting any younger and how you wanted grandkids soon. I know you were only joking but don’t worry about it I will make good on that – I just have to find her first – maybe you could give me a little sign because you know about my shocking luck.
Another thing Dad. I loved how you supported me no matter what. An example of that is how you gave your blessing for me to join the army. It took time for you to come around, but I did inherit your stubbornness and you knew I was going to join up either way. The fact that you said grandad would be proud of me and that it was okay with you even though you didn’t really want me to – that’s something I can’t thank you enough for.
Dad, if I can become half the man you are then I will be content in life. I miss you but I know you are with me and I will see you again some day.
